I’m behind in 30 Rock, but I caught up yesterday, and had to share part of a recent show.

Negative may be funny, but is it bringing you love?

Whether you haven’t seen it, or saw it and could use some reminding, this is practical useful stuff in dating, no matter who you are, how old you are, or what kind of half-orange you’re looking for.

The setting: Liz Lemon has been dragging herself to singles events (singles dodgeball, singles line dancing) for weeks and she’s over it. She finally brings Jack’s love interest Nancy Donovan (played by Julianne Moore) to a mixer. And after Liz points out all the reasons she doesn’t want to date anyone in the room (i.e. “pants tucked into jeans!”), Nancy says this:

“God, Liz, you’re so negative! Every time you say what you don’t want, you sound like a cranky cow! And you’re not that. You’re smart and you’re fun. So stop talking about what you don’t want and start figuring out what you do want. And then go get it.”

Of course hilary ensues when she does, but the point is there just the same. I was very single for a very long time, so I know what it’s like in the trenches. I know that sometimes it feels really good to point out all the reasons love isn’t going to happen with the guys or girls around who are too tall, too weird, too denim, too bald, too serious, too cheap—the list goes on, I know. Lord knows it gets a laugh sometimes. But the fact is, if you’re only pointing out what you don’t like and don’t want, you’re going to sound, well, like a cranky cow! Do you want cool people you’ve just met to hightail it in the other direction because they don’t want to be around someone so negative? No. Of course not.

So I think that when you talk about yourself and dating, be the positive person others want to be around. Talk about what you do want. And then go get it.

Right? Am I alone in this? Or do you think being hilariously negative about love can be a good thing?

Big love and curiously yours,

You might also like:
The Tightrope Fall of Negative Thinking
Daters, Here’s What You’re Doing Wrong…