I have cake on the brain today. Why? Because it’s my birthday!
Your half-orange will celebrate with you! Image: Francesco Marino / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
And unlike people who see theirs as just another date on the calendar, I’m all about the fuss: the cards, the calls, the emails, the works. You want to send me a dancing gorilla with 100 balloons and an air horn? I’m game!
As I told my husband last night, “My birthday is my favorite day of the year.” When I asked him if he felt the same way about his own, he said, “No. Your birthday is my favorite day of the year.”
He was sort of kidding, but the truth is, he gets a kick out of how excited I get about it and does what he can to help me celebrate. And that’s a big deal to keep in mind in dating, too: Your half-orange will want to celebrate with you over what you hold dear. Really. Science says so. According to a study by Shelly Gable, PhD, psychology professor at the University of California at Santa Barbara, one of the most important habits in happy relationships is not just supporting one another when you’re going through a difficult time, but supporting someone’s good news, happy moments and successes.
Now, I realize having a birthday isn’t much of an accomplishment. But if you’re using your dating optimism, you’re feeling all sorts of excited about life, right? You’re trying new things, embracing your passions and making no apologies for the things you love. So ask yourself this: What makes you want to eat cake? Is it throwing a BBQ on the 4th of July? Toasting the anniversary of the day you met your weight loss goal? Playing fantasy baseball? Watching the debut of your favorite reality show? Whatever it is that makes you want to light some candles and pop some champagne, think about this when you’re out there dating and meeting potential partners. Is your date able to appreciate the good news and celebrations with you, to support how much you love what you love?
If you want cake, your half-orange will want to bake it, buy it or serve it to you. So be clear about what your favorite days are. I know I’m not holding back on this one…
Big love,
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Happy Birthday! Mine was yesterday…no wonder I like you so much, you’re a Cancer like me!
I LOVE my birthday! It too is my favorite day of the year, and this one topped it all: my family and friends threw me a surprise party and I’ve never had one! (I turned 30.) Using your half-orange optimism for some time now, I just know it’s gonna be a good year.
Thank you for all your wisdom, and as my friend likes to wish everyone one on their birthdays, “I’m glad you were born!”
andrea r.
Happy Birthday Amy!! I love my birthday too, so completely understand you making the most of your day every year!
I finished your book last week and have been meaning to write you a big THANKS! I love the book and practicing dating optimism in the last week has already had a positive influence on my life. I didn’t meet my half-orange in the last week or anything (wouldn’t that be great??!!), but I’ve had friends comment that my overall presence is just lighter and happier. AND, an ex-boyfriend resurfaced right after I finished your book, and it was so much easier to realize he just isn’t the guy for me when I thought of what I had learned about myself and what I want. (Usually, I would TRY to make it work because maybe this time, etc, etc.)
Thanks again for all your optimism, support and great examples. Hope you have a fabulous birthday!
Aw, what a cool birthday you had — and that’s amazing it was yesterday! We Cancers rock, don’t we?
I’m SO happy your optimism is making your half-orange year a great one so far.
—Amy
Happy Birthday!! I hope it was a great one!!
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Happy Birthday! I have a friend who feels the same way about her birthday and it has become one of my favorite holidays just because she gets so excited about the little stuff. For example, last year I gave her a doughnut and she was overjoyed.
Happy Birthday! And thank you for the wonderful book and inspiring blog!
Happy birthday, Amy!!! Hope you have a great year (full of occasions to eat cake).
Birthdays are the best!
Thank you guys SO much for the incredible birthday wishes. As you know by now, this helped make my day!!
Mindy, I’m THRILLED to hear you’re taking the book to heart, that story about the ex is no joke–good for you to stay strong and hold out for your half-orange! Like Kate P says, I, too, wish you all many occasions for cake. And a doughnut, mmm.
—Amy