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Let Them Let You Eat Cake!

I have cake on the brain today. Why? Because it’s my birthday!

Your half-orange will celebrate with you! Image: Francesco Marino / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

And unlike people who see theirs as just another date on the calendar, I’m all about the fuss: the cards, the calls, the emails, the works. You want to send me a dancing gorilla with 100 balloons and an air horn? I’m game!

As I told my husband last night, “My birthday is my favorite day of the year.” When I asked him if he felt the same way about his own, he said, “No. Your birthday is my favorite day of the year.”

He was sort of kidding, but the truth is, he gets a kick out of how excited I get about it and does what he can to help me celebrate. And that’s a big deal to keep in mind in dating, too: Your half-orange will want to celebrate with you over what you hold dear. Really. Science says so. According to a study by Shelly Gable, PhD, psychology professor at the University of California at Santa Barbara, one of the most important habits in happy relationships is not just supporting one another when you’re going through a difficult time, but supporting someone’s good news, happy moments and successes.

Now, I realize having a birthday isn’t much of an accomplishment. But if you’re using your dating optimism, you’re feeling all sorts of excited about life, right? You’re trying new things, embracing your passions and making no apologies for the things you love. So ask yourself this: What makes you want to eat cake? Is it throwing a BBQ on the 4th of July? Toasting the anniversary of the day you met your weight loss goal? Playing fantasy baseball? Watching the debut of your favorite reality show? Whatever it is that makes you want to light some candles and pop some champagne, think about this when you’re out there dating and meeting potential partners. Is your date able to appreciate the good news and celebrations with you, to support how much you love what you love?

If you want cake, your half-orange will want to bake it, buy it or serve it to you. So be clear about what your favorite days are. I know I’m not holding back on this one…

Big love,

This entry was posted on Thursday, July 1st, 2010 at 12:01 am and is filed under Being yourself, Optimisms. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

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