Posts Tagged ‘optimism’

 

Your “Pretty” Love Place

Friday, May 28th, 2010

I was listening to an old Astrud Gilberto album yesterday when I heard a song that really spoke to me. It had such a powerfully optimistic message that I want to pass it on to you. The song is called “Lugar Bonita,” which means “Pretty Place.”

Your pretty place—in love—is ahead of you. (Image: AS)

While I’d heard this song tens of times before, this time I was really listening to the words and I was moved by her optimism. These are the words of a woman moving forward on a path, not knowing exactly what’s at the end, but knowing it will be a pretty place, a happy ending. You can be this woman! (And guys, you can, too!) It just takes saying these same hopeful words enough that you really believe them.

If you have three minutes and nineteen seconds, put on some headphones, close your eyes (or stare at your computer and pretend to be working) and listen to what she’s singing.

Astrud is right:

On the road of life I travel, looking forward, never back,
Looking to that dream before me, leaving old dreams in my track.

Lugar bonita, bonita, it’s a pretty place, I know.
Lugar bonita, bonita, at the end of this road.

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Big love,

How I Met Your…Quirks

Tuesday, September 29th, 2009

If you don’t watch How I Met Your Mother (Mondays on CBS), you’re missing out on some big laughs. It’s a refreshingly un-reality-based sitcom that’s not only full of brilliantly current writing, but also some surprisingly deep insights about life, dating and love.

Ted (played by Josh Radnor) makes a smart speech (Image: CBS.com)

Ted (played by Josh Radnor) makes a smart speech (Image: CBS.com)

Last night, for example, Ted ended up on a blind date with the same exact person seven years later. It took both of them a minute to realize, “We’ve been on this date before!” Yet, as true optimists who decided to gain something good from their date no matter what, they took turns telling each other what turned them off about each other the first time around so they could learn about themselves for the future—i.e. she didn’t like that Ted pointed out typos in the menu and made a lame joke about how not sharing the oysters would be “shellfish.” He didn’t like that she likes to dress her cats in costumes. In the end [SPOILER ALERT!], as the pair tried to figure out whether or not to have a go of it this time, Ted said this to his date:

I just remembered why I didn’t call you. I like finding typos in menus. And I know my shellfish pun is stupid, but the truth is, I’m not suddenly going to stop making stupid jokes. Shouldn’t we hold out for the person who doesn’t just tolerate our little quirks, but actually kinda likes them?

Yes yes yessss! I know that some people love to say that choosing a partner is all about compromise, but as I say in Meeting Your Half-Orange, it’s about possibly compromising later—once you’ve found someone you feel is compromising for. But you shouldn’t have to compromise who you are. You shouldn’t feel you have to hold back saying things, or feel you’re not allowed to love your cats, or think it’s no big deal if someone doesn’t get your jokes. Why? Because it’s a big deal if someone doesn’t get your jokes!

Your jokes are a representation of who you are. What you find funny is a combination of what you’ve learned in life, how your brain works, what your heart feels and what will make you laugh every single day for the rest of your life. Do you really think it’s okay to settle for someone who doesn’t get what makes you laugh for the rest of your life? Nothing comes between Brooke and her Calvins and nothing should come between you and what makes you laugh. Period.

So do as Ted says: Hold out for the person who doesn’t just tolerate your quirks, but absolutely definitely likes them. Because when you’re totally being who you are, that’s when you’ll meet the person who’s totally right for you.

You might also like:
Mad Men: More Than Eye Candy
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Big love,

Amy Signature 4